We are back in New Castle!
Proud to be fucking home!
[Cheering]
We're going to go fucking berserk.
Get it!
C'mon!
I'm buzzing.
[Cheering]
She's a slut!
Whoa whoa whoa!
It's Marnie!
[Cheering]
It's me baby cousin, Marnie.
What the hell?
What the fuck is she even doing here?
Yes, I am intimidated, she's fucking gorgeous.
I want to get everyone together and make a bucket list.
I would like to have chickens.
Oh my God, I've got one, I've got one!
I'm in bed with Marnie; I could be in for a good night here.
Shit, I'm starting to realize that I do like him
and I can't fight it.
¶
I should have a degree in pulling women.
I am a Geordie girl, with a VIP edge.
I'm a natural beauty, real boobs, real hair.
Can't wait to get in this house, because I'm going to tear
the place up.
I would never kiss anyone without a six-pack.
The hardest graft I've ever done is doing me hair.
I'm fake, I'm flirty, and I've got double f's.
I could talk the back legs off a donkey.
¶
Once again, I woke up just with James, Scott is with Marnie
again cuddling and getting me a mug off.
I wonder if he's finally got his end away, I mean his balls
must be the size of his head by now, fuckin' massive.
The way Scott's going is not going to bang Marnie
because Marnie is playing him at his own game.
¶
So I've walked in the lads' room and they are trying
to slit us about Marnie.
Oh, fuck off.
Don't even start.
But, they're blindly just jealous because Gaz only
pulls birds, what look like feet.
Scott's now saying that he's going to go off and pull other
birds, I'll believe that when I see it.
Startin' to look like Scott's starting to move over to
the dark side, the relationship crew.
Marnie's in for a right grillin' this morning.
Marnie where did you sleep last night?
In the downstairs bedroom, but nothing went on.
So, you weren't alone?
I know Holly okay, if she knows I kissed Scott last night,
so for now I'm just going to deny the whole thing.
But, I am staying away.
Like, we are staying away.
She's doing it in that way, where they actually don't.
[Laughter]
Everyone is questioning Marnie and asking why on earth she got
in bed with Scott when she said she would keep away?
And, she's in denial.
Scott and Marnie are wrong, and what they're doing
is inconsiderate and selfish.
There's no "I" in "team," Marnie.
But, there is a "U" in cunt.
I never for one minute thought that we'd have chickens,
so I'm going to play a trick on the girls.
They'll never know that I plant the eggs here, they'll think
it just came straight out the chicken.
¶
Oh my god!
Me and Vicki are outside and we can see eggs, big ones!
She said we only need one each.
These hens are doing me proud.
There's fucking four!
Four gorgeous clean little eggs.
That's come out of the eggs ass hole.
Oh my God.
With dates stamped on them, how fucking thick you
think we are lads?
These chickens are fucking clever things.
They've already mastered the Irish stomping.
[Laughter]
¶
Oh my God.
I've noticed Egg is really puny.
C'mon it's okay, it's okay.
Scrambled has been bullying Egg, have they had an argument?
Has one of them slept with one of their girlfriends?
There you go, I've never seen a fish in this state before.
Why don't you bring the man that works at the petshop?
He would probably throw it away.
He knows a lot about fish.
I can't watch Egg suffer like this.
This is a fish emergency.
Maybe I'm not such a "Doctor Dolittle" after all.
¶
Your laundry?
Your dirty laundry?
The sheets that are spewed all over are starting
to stink the house out.
And, Gary's had sex on them.
Bye.
¶
So, I'm in the car with Marnie, and I'm introducing her living
in a house full of scumbags and tramps.
Them are absolutely minging.
Full of discharge.
Not only have it gotten discharge, but we've got sheets
with cum on and we've got another sick.
It's pure Geordie Shore in that bag isn't it?
Sticks from smelling it from here.
And, it smells like absolute sewage.
This one's to be used, that's dryer, this is the washer.
Me, Marnie in the launderette and it's just nice to finally
get time to speak to each other.
So, how are you feeling about everything now?
You've got to think, your family is more important then lying
in bed with a boy.
She's making us feeling like I have got to pick between me
feelings with Scott, and me own family.
But, is it hurting you more than its hurting Holly.
Yeah.
Holly doesn't even care.
She does care she just say that she's not bothered, she is
bothered, we just left the house, and she's
still flirting with Scott.
As far as I'm concerned, it's not as if I've slept with him.
Marnie is telling me that she's not going to sleep with Scott,
but if she's living in a house 24/7 with him, and he's going to
be touching her fannie, or leading her on,
a finger is going to slip up.
If you say some things, stick to your word.
I did mean it when I said it.
Yeah.
I wasn't just talking shit.
But, then you got to stick to your word.
I don't give a shit what any of them think of us, I'm always
going to do what I want and if I want Scott,
I'm going to go for him.
¶
It's been a few days now, and I haven't spoke to Mitch,
so I'm going to give him a call, and hopefully he'll
answer the phone.
I'm calling him and calling him, and he's not answering
the phone, and I'm starting to get really worried.
Why isn't he picking up?
Ugh!
Is he not speaking to us anymore, or what?
Have I done anything wrong?
Ugh!
So, Charlotte tried to call Mitch and he hasn't
answered the phone.
And, she's going nuts.
The kids' just probably in the shower or having a shit.
It's Saturday, he's not even at work.
He might be in the shower, or on the toilet.
I feel like he might just not want to speak to us while
I'm in this house.
¶
So, I'm not having a very good day.
Me boyfriend is not answering his phone, and then the
fish doctor arrives.
Egg's really puny, look his tails all bitten off,
and look at his scales.
He doesn't look well at all does he?
I got to take him away from ya, put him in the car,
and try to fix him for ya.
Do you think you can fix him, Craig?
Oh yeah, definitely.
Craig, can make Egg better.
Egg's going to come back a new man fish!
So, it's like fish hospital?
Yeah, it'll be little fish hospital time.
Awh.
Bye Egg, I'll miss ya.
You're going to get better.
Yes.
¶
In Australia, Holly had major cock fright,
it's time we got that slag back out there, back on the cock,
and loving life again.
So, we're going to take her to a strip house.
The more they try to push me to the cock, the more I'm going
to push away from it.
Cock is not going to help me get over the cock fright.
Just stop it.
You've got to face your fear.
That's exactly -- if you're scared of heights,
jump off a building.
if you're scared of cocks, look one right in the eye.
We're going to see some cocks!
[yelling]
Cock, cock, cock!
¶
[girls shout in unison] Girls night!
¶
So we're getting the strippers, and Holly has got cock fright.
What else can we do to help her get over this fear of the cock?
I'm looking at the stage, and there's cocks flying
around everywhere.
And, not just any cocks, larger cocks then I've ever seen
in my entire life.
¶
My God!
The size of these willy's.
I would not know what to do with it, it would come up me mouth!
So, I'm talking to Holly about the Scott thing again.
But, she's telling me that, she only just wants a bit of
a flirting, a bit of banging is all, everything is great.
At the end of the day, I will sleep with Scott, if I want
to sleep with Scott.
I don't care what she says.
Charlotte is trying her hardest to have a laugh, the fact of the
matter is, she is miserable.
All she is thinking about is Mitch.
All of a sudden, it just all comes over us, I'm so worried
about Mitch and I know there's something wrong.
Charlotte is completely and utterly inconsolable.
All she wants to do is be with Mitch, and I understand.
I've got to go, I've got to sort this out.
At the minute, my relationship with Mitch is so much more
important than being in this house.
Charlotte is in such a state she just needs to go home and she
needs to speak to Mitch and work out what's going on.
I'm sad that I need to leave them, but I know there is no
other way around this, if I don't sort my own drama out,
I'm not going to be able to have fun in the house.
¶
I've got to go.
At the minute, my relationship with Mitch is so much
more important than being in this house.
So, the lads arrive at the club and they're all in
this majorley, massive good mood.
They didn't even realize Charlotte's gone.
Charlotte did want to go see her boyfriend, Mitch,
I wish she came back.
Holly, she's getting herself into a bit of a bonnie
situation here like and it's not good.
I don't really know what's going on with me and Scott.
So, I want to talk to him and see how he feels.
Tonight I'm going to test the waters with Marnie,
and pull someone else and she how she reacts.
All I'm hoping is, Scott sticks to his word, he pulls a bird,
and we'll actually have a good night with no drama.
Scott and Gary are back to pulling, and it looks like Gary
has got his wing man back.
If that's the way Scott wants to play it, fuck it,
two can play at that game.
I spotted one of me lad friends, so I'm going to go over
and pretend to pull him.
If they're trying to act like 12-year-olds, trying to make
each other jealous then that's just sad.
Scott is actually sticking to his word, and we actually
are cracking on with some birds.
So, we've all pulled tonight.
I've got a bird, Marnie's got a lad, and Gaz has got a bird.
Fucking hell, there is going to be some pure semen
flying around tonight.
So, I'm taking this bird back tonight, and it's going to
be strictly professional.
We're going to have a business meeting in the shag pad.
And, she's going to be on a conference call with me cock.
Scott is already in the shag pad with some bird.
So, as a mate I'm going to try to get him a threesome.
Aye, with Rachel the chicken.
I've seem do worse.
So, me and James put Rachel into the shag pad where Scott
is balls deep in a girl.
We are going to be a total cock block.
So, I'm smashing this bird all over, and I hear this commotion
outside, and I look over and there is a fucking chicken in
the bedroom, and I'm in for a threesome but not
with this bird.
I hear these screeching noises coming from the shag pad;
don't know if that's Rachel the chicken,
or Scott crying because we spoiled his buck.
So, I get home to find that Scott is already in the shag pad
with that lass, so I'm going to go in and try and cock
block the fuck out of him.
I don't know why Marnie is acting all big all of a sudden
because this isn't the little cousin that I know.
Fucking hell, she is taking it one step too far.
Are you being for real?
So, Marnie comes in the shag pad and she's giving the bird I'm
with the third degree, and I'm just lying there with a proper
stink on, and all she wants to do is chat.
Shut up, shut up.
What the fuck why?
Oh my God.
I'm gone.
It's pissing us off.
So, I can hear Scott kicking off in the shag pad.
He's obviously got it that I know he's banged that girl
and he's fucked his chances up with me.
Scott is smashing the house up, no respect for anyone in
this house or the stuff.
Are you having fun, Scott?
[Inaudible]
And, then Marnie decides that she's going to start
questioning him.
How much funny happened?
[Inaudible]
Is she bothered about Scott, obviously so.
You have sex?
No.
Scott is storming out the house; he's gone crazy, he's so angry
that Marnie cock blocked him.
Oh my God.
Marnie's work is up, so much tonight, that I decided I need
to get me self home because I need to chill the fuck out.
To be honest, I don't even think Scott's went home, I think he
just ran to the nearest shop, cuz he's run out of tampons.
¶
So, I wake up this morning and Scott's still gone,
it's not very nice to think it could be because of me.
So, Marnie comes into the lad's room, and she's telling us that
Scott hasn't come back, fucking hell man, not again.
I try to convince myself that I didn't like Scott, but I do like
Scott, and now look what's happened.
I don't think Scott should've went,
I think he's overreacting there, like --
Everyone's wondering where Scott is,
I'm not bothered but Scott has got to say I want my
best friend Charlotte.
Aye, aye.
Oh, here he is.
I don't even know where to look, it feels really awkward.
Ladies!
I'm so disappointed, I was hoping it would be Charlotte
coming through, nope, bloody Scott, the baboon.
Where did you go?
I was fucking nashed.
Why?
Oh yeah, I don't even know, I was absolutely mortal drunk.
Shock, he's not admitting that he left last night
because of Marnie.
So, why did you leave then?
Are you going to tell us the real reason?
I really don't know.
We are never going to get the truth out of Scott;
he's never going to tell us the honest reason about why
he left last night.
You know I'm like, anything that comes about.
No one has got a reason to be angry with us, but if you are,
then fuck off.
Was it because Marnie pulled a lad?
I didn't pull him, he was a friend.
After last night's escape, I think I'm going to have to go
back to pulling girls by myself, and leave Scott to fall happily
in love with Marnie, and live happily ever after.
Well, in walks Anna and she tells that I'm getting punished.
I've arranged something for you to do today;
I'd like Marnie to go with ya.
I'm not very happy about going to work, but at the same time,
it'll give us a chance to talk to Scott away from the others,
and out the house.
¶
So, me and Marnie are getting sent down New Castle key site
to pick up fucking litter.
This is mean.
I swear to God, if any of my mates see me do this, I'm diving
straight in the time because they're going to have my life.
What the fuck is wrong with chips?
Has that been in someone's ass?
[Laughter]
Awh, it stinks.
What?
Say that again.
Normally around boys, I'm very confident, but around Scott,
I feel like a 14-year-old girl.
How you feel about us?
What I think is going to happen to us, if you do want to pull,
you can pull, I'm probably going to get bothered,
you were the same with me.
No, but I don't want you to pull girls.
He doesn't look very happy about it, but if he wants me
that's what he's got to do.
But, I --
Whoa, whoa, Scotty T does not dive into relationships
that quickly, especially not from the Geordie Shore house.
Oh God man.
I know that Scott likes us, but he's too bothered about
what other people think.
Are we sweet anyway?
Yeah, we're fine.
Cool.
I feel really happy,
because me and Scott finally sorted everything out.
And, there's nothing better to end it with,
than a nice little cuddle.
I can feel it through the quilt, Scott.
Us lads need to get ourselves to the gym, so no one throw
dumbbells around because I want to look fucking mighty tonight.
Gaz probably knows that he's better than anyone else in the
house, so I'm going to ask his advice on whether or not to ply
Marnie off or to get with her.
Gym done, now it's tie to have our first lads night out, one
thing that is cool, my wingman is back.
So, me and the girls are all sitting around, and we think
we should stay in a night because if we go out,
it's just weird without Charlotte.
10 inch?
10 inch.
Stuffed crust.
Chicken dinners.
Cheese patty.
Bag of chips.
Cheesy chips.
Then a Diet Coke because I'm much thicker.
So, the girls have decided that they're going to stay in and
get a take away, fuck that, I want to go out
and get pissed with the lads.
Is it all right if I come?
Unless she has grown a cock in the last 20 minutes,
then no she can't.
All he fucking cares about is pleasing Gary, and it's starting
to really piss us off.
It's awkward.
You don't want to distance yourself from them anymore.
I'll take your advice.
I know, it couldn't get much worse at all.
Fuck.
Scott just said no to Marnie which means there's still some
kind of lad left in him, he's not as pussy-whipped except
for how he was.
You need to get ready.
All right, let's get ready.
Hello.
What's this about?
New girls are asking to come out and lash on lads date night?
No.
Well, have a good night boys.
I'm actually buzzing for lad's night.
Just had to get away from the drama, get away from the girls,
and that stinkin' house, go out and get fucking smashed tonight.
¶
I'm struggling, I don't understand, like, does she
not want to be friends with me or something?
So, I'm a little bit angry at this, at the minute,
because why would you not want to stay in with us?
You can not come in here and start messing on with lads when
you've got history with other girls in here.
I just felt like that was girl code.
I feel like she feels like she rules the house already.
I rule this house, and never fucking forget that.
It's lad's night tonight, so we're going for a few games
of pool and pre-drinks before we hit the tune.
I'm not going to do that with Marnie, after she's blandly
just declared her love for us.
I'm actually ashamed of the lad I used to know called Scott,
now he's grew a fanny on his period, pathetic.
Anybody?
Oh my God.
Sausage.
This is ridiculous.
I was hoping that the night with the girls, wouldn't be that bad,
but to be honest, it just feels awkward already.
I can't believe you asked them to go out on boy's night.
I'm bored though; I'm so bored I don't want to stay in.
Boy's night, you know what I mean?
I'm just not used to sitting about, and not doing anything.
Pardon.
I think your game for asking a mate like.
I'm very game.
I wouldn't have asked.
Holly has got a face like a slapped doss again.
I don't know what this lass's problem is.
It's so weird knowing that Marnie would rather be with the
boys instead of the girls, and I feel like well if that's the
case, then I don't feel like you deserve to even sit
around with us.
Let's all just enjoy girl's night anyway.
Where's the mozarella?
I would much rather be here more than you.
Lad's night is going amazing so far, few games of pool,
chilled out few drinks, now time to hit Bijoux.
In the past, lad's night have been shit, all that is involved
is Scott and Gaz's pulling.
But, now Scott's got himself a girlfriend.
It will be interesting to see what happens tonight.
When it comes down to Scott's pulled it, he hasn't pulled a
bird, he hasn't even necked on with a bird, but fuck it, I'm
going to do what I do best, get a bird, and fuck off home.
We get back to the house and everyone is smashed.
Louder!
Shh!
Sorry.
I'm fucking bob slaying.
Me and Scott are on a rampage.
Going nuts.
This is mint.
What I want to do is this bird, get in the shag pad, Scott and
James however, want to go cuddle chickens.
You know it is, you're my best friend.
All I know is I'm laying in the chicken coup, covered in shit,
trying to crack on to Rachel.
¶
I've only been up 10 minutes, and Marnie is already asking
if Scott pulled.
I never knew what Marnie said her name was, I do now, Keen.
So my bucket list, I want to be able to MENSA,
so it's time for me to sit the test.
Go.
I'm not actually thick, like there is a brain up there,
and it just untapped potential.
Oh God!
Everyone knows that I've got a highest IQ in the house,
I've gone wicked and I'm tall as fuck.
Oh my!
I don't know what the word means!
That's 30 seconds.
I feel like I'm getting a migraine, I never felt
like this in school.
Well, your time is up.
Do you use that marker?
No.
Ow!
I'm chilling in the kitchen, door opens,
bang Charlotte is back.
Hi.
I'm back in the house, and the first person I see is, Gary.
Hi Holly!
So, I run down the stairs and I just grab hold of her and
I don't ever want to let her go, she's never leaving
this house again.
Are you pleased?
So pleased.
Much more happy now like, just need to get some tongue on.
[Laughter]
Holly is still insisting that she has fucking cock fright.
So, in a last ditch attempt to try and get her over
this medical condition.
We're going to make pottery penises.
Yeah!
Hello!
This isn't going to help; it's not a real penis.
I'm not scared of clay; I could probably just make a nice pot.
All right, who's first?
Me!
I'm the one with the fright of the cock.
Okay, I'll mold James's then.
This is just bringing back major memories, it's awful.
I'm really not buying Holly's cock fright anymore.
Watching her work that wheel, if she's not missing the cock,
I do not know who is.
Oh my God!
[Laughter]
Marnie, you go next.
Next up is Marnie, so I'm thinking that because she hasn't
had a detailed look at Scott's cock, Holly starts to step in
and starts to consultsy type rule.
Why does it got big curls in it?
It's fine we will cross them off his hands.
So, this is all a little bit awkward, making Scott's cock
with the help of Holly.
Does it really have a very big belland?
She's trying to pull us off saying it's not that big,
but I know she's only saying it because she wants
it again herself.
Things in the house haven't been how I hoped it would be with me
and Sophie, so I feel like I need to speak with her and get
everything out in the open.
Is it hard for you to deal with a family member there?
Ahh.
I'm not having a good time.
Because I've got me family member here.
I don't know what's going on in Marnie's head right now.
Marnie can be really naïve.
I'm not happy, it's making us down because I'm having to talk
about you and Scott, which I don't want to happen.
I got to remain calm because I have to remember
she is me family.
I've got nothing more to say.
So you're going to be like upset, I can't believe
you'd even act like that.
I would never be like that with Sophie, she's being worse
than all the other girls.
I can't believe she's treated us like this, and I'm really angry.
Okay, well Marnie walked off.
Sophie comes back and tells us that her and Marnie
have just had a massive falling out.
So, what do I do now?
Do I feel like I should apologize?
If you apologize now, you look like you've
done something wrong.
Sophie's finally blew her top with Marnie, this should've
happened a long time ago.
I'm quite proud of what you've done because you always take
Marnie's side regardless of right and wrong, and I think
you're really right.
I am too.
I'm a very fair person; I'm very even person.
You have been very fair.
This is Marnie's final bridge as far as the girls are concerned.
And, she just burnt it.
Okay.
So, everyone said what they wanted to do for
the bucket list.
Now, its Gaz's go.
[Inaudible]
One of my bucket list things is called cannoning.
James is worried about it because he can't swim.
James, nice to meet you.
I'm shitting me self.
I've only got me 10-meter badge.
I'm not a good swimmer.
Don't worry about it, we'll look after you.
¶
We've got a number of tasks to do, crawling,
sliding, and jumps.
Cannoning is fucking sick; throwing me self off water
falls, crawling through caves, and even fucking rocks.
Loving life.
I feel like I'm in a tropical rainforest, or a jungle.
I can't believe this place is just outside New Castle.
Last jump, biggest of the day.
My favorite jump, it's in three and a half meters of water.
Now, it's on to the big one.
It's now or never.
Fucking hell!
He is just scared of water.
Ahh!
If I died, at least I can say I've died being brave.
I can't believe James, the kid that can't even swim,
has just jumped off that.
Have some other fucking water, you bellands!
[Cheering]
That was so good.
Fuck you, Gaz.
¶
Coming into the house, I always thought that me and Sophie would
be dead close, but it just hasn't turned out like that.
Marnie looks upset, Sophie has got to guard her, now if my
cousin came into this house, I'd do anything to look after them,
not give them the cold shoulder.
I've known Sophie for a long time and I must say,
I am disappointed.
The only thing I can point this on, is she's jealous.
The boys have made us feel a lot better about being in the house
because now I feel like I've got someone there to talk to.
Hey.
Look what I've got earlier.
What's that?
My MENSA results have arrived!
I'm so nervous; this could determine my whole future.
You are just below average for qualification.
No!
She's been certified, thick as fuck.
You will not be able to join MENSA.
I'm absolutely fuming, because all the lad's were doing was
distracting me, and I feel like if they weren't there,
I could've actually got in.
Well, at least I've got tits.
MENSA is missing out.
Holly guttered that she didn't get into MENSA, but I don't
have enough to talk about science and shit.
I mean I love atoms.
[Doorbell rings]
Ding-dong.
Why is the doorbell ringing?
Oh!
You all right?
Sophie!
The doorbell rings, it's Joel, maybe he can solve this family
feud between Marnie and Sophie.
Joel come and brings a number of things.
Sophie's going to get shagged, Sophie's going to get drunk,
and Sophie's probably going to have to clean
up Joel's sick, God, Sophie's going to be busy.
Marnie, give him a hug.
I've never met Joel before, but I'm so happy he's here.
Hopefully, he can cheer Sophie up, and make her not be
nasty with us anymore.
I don't want me family to get involved with this.
Why me?
It just sounds like you don't want to be here.
Yeah.
You're cousins though, you should be like proper just
like little team together, just be cousins about it.
Are you all right?
Good, how are you?
Me yourself and Scott, Scott is my best friend here.
Me and him got along well in Australia.
Oh my God, you did?
This is perfect, I've been wanting to get Scott on his own
for ages and it could possibly break the ice
with me and Sophie.
You know what?
Already I like Joel, because he is trying to make things
better with me and Sophie, and I do think that he's the
only one who could.
I've told Marnie before, I don't do dates.
I'm not even sure if it's going to be worth it, even if I get a
cheaty nest at the end of it.
Oh God.
I'm only going to go to have a laugh with Joel, but I'm not
classifying it as a date whatsoever.
What has happened with this house?
And, why are people going on double dates?
Shush, shush.
I think Gary wants Scott more than me, why else would someone
be so bothered that I'm spending time with him?
Poor Scotty T, his head is going to explode, on one hand he's got
Marnie who he fancies and wants to put his dick in, but then
again on the other hand, he's got girls he's mint, who he also
fancies and also wants to put his dick in.
It's just all too much for Scott and his little brain.
¶
I'm feeling so nervous about this date.
For one, it's the first time I've spoken with Sophie since
the argument, and two, I've got to deal with Scott's shyness.
This doesn't feel like a date anyways, it just feels like I'm
here with three mates, and one of the birds wants to shag us,
but that's just standard crack.
What was different to get with Holly than it was
with Marnie though?
At least with Holly whenever it happened it was when I was
actually absolutely patron, like mortal mortal drunk.
You still flirt with Holly now though.
Yeah, but it's nothing.
I flirt with everyone, if Marnie wasn't here, I would probably
flirt with a fucking cutlery.
Awh, give him a break man.
I know, it was great.
So, how's things with you and Sophie feel like?
I just feel like I don't want to me real family who is me old
fashioned boat, to get involved with me Geordie Shore family.
Yeah, I wasn't looking at it from your point of view.
And, the last thing I want to do is upset you,
I don't want to see you here.
Sophie, that's the last thing I want to do, is upset you,
I do think that we are close enough to get through it though.
Yeah, cool.
Tonight I was really worried about me and Sophie.
I feel like she is starting to deal with me being in the
house and it's all going to be put behind us.
So, I think Scott finally came around to the fact
that we're on a date.
He's flirting with us all night, being dead touchy feely.
And, I even got a cheapy little kiss in at the end.
¶
[Laughter]
Just me and you left, sir?
Nah.
I wonder how they're going on their little double date.
A double date.
Me and Gaz still can't believe that Scotty T is on a date.
I can't wait for the wedding, I just hope they let us
where a vest.
I'm back, let's get pissed, also the couples can go suck
each other off, and then I'll just get fucked.
I'm so pleased you're back, three musketeers.
¶
We are absolutely buzzing for tonight, I feel rested, I don't
feel hung over, and I'm ready to get fucking mortal.
¶
We get to House of Smith, and the double date lot
are not where to be seen.
But, we are wasting no time, the drinks are out,
the ice is in the cups, let's get on it!
¶
I feel like Marnie is a little bit deluded because I don't ever
feel like Scott's going to want to be in a relationship with
her, and it's only going to go one way and that's
a fucking disaster.
¶
Scott arrives at the club, and he can't even look me in the
eye, he knows he's going against every lad code we've got.
In the Geordie Shore house, you do not go on a fucking date.
Since the double date crew have come in,
everything has got a little bit awkward.
But, let's cheers to that.
I'm so pleased that I solved everything out with Sophie at
the meal, but as far as the three girls are concerned,
they can all fuck off.
I do like Scott, but I'm getting sick of the way
he's messing with us.
I'm not a toy, if he likes us; he just needs to show it
in front of everyone else.
My main objective when Joel comes up is to show him
how Geordie's drink.
Leave the club, no one's pulled, everyone's mortal.
This is going to be a painful day in the morning.
¶
Get up!
Pathetic, pathetic!
Now.
So, we get back to the house,
and Joel is absolutely platted.
You shit yourself?
You fucking shit yourself!
You've got shit on your boxers.
He might look like a Geordie boy,
but he definitely can't drink like one.
¶