I'm gonna do promotions.
Apparently, she's some big hot shot in town.
You'll be doing launches.
But you must keep this house tidy.
Are you single like a what.
No, I got a boyfriend.
You got a boyfriend?!
First night with a boyfriend
gonna jump straight in bed with Garry.
I've never ever, ever, ever doubted with you.
Garry's in another room with another fucking girl.
That makes me look like mug.
So much sexual tension with Vicky and Jay.
It's like a light bulb you turn off and on.
Just been necking on with the lads.
You did it first, Jay!
Ian's kissing me, so I--
Is it retaliate?
It's like a parsnip.
(screaming).
It's was like my forearm.
Charlotte's in the bag.
I'm gonna give her a night she'll never forget.
Garry's creeping on Charlotte.
My God.
Charlotte-- (snoring)
My whole game plan just went down the drain.
Devastated.
¶
(Jay) My biggest fear is getting wrinkles.
(Vicky) I'm a Geordie girl with a VIP edge.
(Gary) I should have a degree in pulling women.
(Charlotte) I'll never kiss anyone without a six-pack.
(James) The hardest craft I've ever done is doing hair.
(Sophie) I can talk the back legs off a donkey.
(Greg) Dress to impress, that's me.
(Holly) I'm fit, I'm flirty, and I got double "Fs".
(all) Geordie Shore!
¶
I snugged Gary last night, popped me buttons.
Then I sex with him, you know?
I had sex with him.
I'm so disappointed in meself.
Yeah, Charlotte is wild.
She lives up to all expectations.
She's like that little tiger.
The little one in the pack--
That little rare one that just runs wild.
I have my giant plastered--
I'm going to actually have to go to hospital.
He's popped me brain out of me skull
because I can't even think.
I can't even think properly.
Do you know what though right, it's not happening again.
Like this is it now.
I knew it was coming.
Always said it would be a matter of time.
And that was job done.
Do you know what? I'm gonna sit here and say,
"No, that's it.
Me and Gary aren't gonna even see each other anymore.
And tomorrow, I'll be shagging him again.
(laughing)
(cries out)
(yelling)
Gaz has been dipping his wick in Charlotte.
And I can see exactly where this is gonna lead.
Charlotte is gonna start having feelings for Gary.
To be honest, I really don't think
he's gonna care about it.
To Gary, Charlotte's just there
if he fancy's a fuck basically.
I had sex with Gary.
You fucking what?
It was so un-preordained.
So she's coming, she's like,
"Oh, yeah, I'm not gonna have sex and things like that."
We're like, "Charlotte, just don't say never
because you never know what happens."
She's like, "No, no, no, I'm not.
I'm not going to. I'm not going to."
What happened this morning?
Sex.
Are you not in pain?
Have you not peed? How are you standing there?
But she's walk like John Wayne today.
Poor that little girl.
No matter what she does,
our Charlotte can just not resist that parsnip.
Oh, my God.
Too much rum for the morning, I got to be at work soon.
I'm going to work.
Me and Jay confuses each other.
Last night, we're having this great family night out
which rapidly turns sour.
It's just because you were flirting with us all day...
Have a crack on and everything.
And then the bit of it got in the club,
you sacked us off for that bird straight away.
We can have like a date type scenario.
But at the end of day,
we're coming back to same house together.
You with were with him too a lot all night.
Oh, my God. You're doing this last night.
And this is what irritated us,
it's because you donate first, Jay.
It's hard.
It's playing with my head a bit.
And I know it's playing with his.
I think we basically both want the best of both worlds.
If we carry on the way we're going,
it's just constantly going to be arguing
every night we go out.
It's like we need to come to some arrangement, sort it out.
Oh, Vicky, you piece of--
¶
We got a job to do.
Champagne and reception, it's a smart job.
Put me and Charlotte together
which would be a good laugh anyway.
I'll probably spend the whole day in hysterics.
I love Gaz and Charlotte to a certain extent,
but that is a love affair that's gonna end in tears.
This is gonna be a Shakespearean tragedy,
mark my words.
¶
She's gonna end up falling for him.
And I'm not happy because that's my little sister.
And I'm not having me little sister heart
get broken at all.
We'll need you champagne fall.
And I need you meeting and greeting.
Would like some champagne there?
Not a problem.
I was like on the champagne fountain.
Charlotte was more meeting and greeting,
the clipboard.
Worst job for her ever, don't even think she even read.
I've got this list of people's names.
And like when people come, I have to say,
"What is your name?"
Oh, oh, can I have your names?
And then I tell them you can go in.
But if the name's not on, I can't let them go in.
Your name's not down.
Your name's not down, you have to leave.
You're not getting in. You're not getting in.
But they're sneaking around side and that.
Oh, no, you need to stop all of that mind.
I can do that like every other week.
I had a really good time as well.
Oh, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.
But I didn't have a good time
when I looked at the first two names
and it was me ex's mom and dad.
Hi! Yeah.
I was shitting meself.
(chattering)
Do you? Do you really misses?
I'm the best at that.
Oh, is your name's on the list?
I love being around her
because she's literally hilarious.
She doesn't understand life.
Like everything's a joke, she doesn't understand anything.
So being just around her makes the day go so much better.
Bend us over this pool.
No-- It's like an old couple.
Quick, come on, do it now.
I can't. I'm ready.
I can't. I can't.
Today was quite fun actually.
We were flirting like lords.
I think he's in love with us.
I think he might be falling in love with us.
We can never be boyfriend and girlfriend.
I mean, thinking about me and Charlotte trying to
sort out a mortgage or doing bills,
it just-- it wouldn't happen.
She's me bunker anyway.
A bunker, according to Gary,
is someone who's just there for you when you haven't pulled.
So he comes and spoons me.
Well, if I'm a bunker, he is a fucking wanker.
I'm just gonna play it very smooth.
You kind of keep the balance right.
Like make her aware every now and again,
that look, "I will be going with other girls."
And if I keep that balance right,
I can have a very good thing going on.
Hey, hey. Hiya.
Hello, sir. Good night last night?
I'm hanging me, mate.
Hope you soon, I saw you taching on.
What happened to the boyfriend?
Oh, my God, Holly last night apparently
she kissed another lad.
You noticed-- obsessed of her boyfriend,
she just kissed someone else, so.
No, no, I was in--
I was in the VIP booth that we use.
And everybody had somebody.
And I was like I didn't want to go off
and want to be like cock-blocking it up.
Every time I sat down, like, "Don't be clockblock."
Basically, I just had a bit of grind.
Snugged up with him.
Didn't mean anything.
Snugging on with somebody made me feel part of the group.
I did feel more included and like I was doing everything
that everybody else was doing.
And to be fair, it was fun.
I enjoyed it, I don't regret it.
I had the best night ever.
I really enjoyed myself.
I will tell my boyfriend.
It doesn't bother me, like I will be honest with him.
I'm not gonna lie to him.
If my boyfriend's not there for me then so be it.
But I had fun, it's not liked I fucking like
gone and shagged somebody.
This girl tells one lie after another.
And another lie is that her and her boyfriend have got a pact.
That pact does not exist.
And I would be very fucking surprised
if he's that much of a mug.
(doorbell chimes)
The doorbell goes and everyone's like
wondering who it is.
(girl) I'm here for Holly?
(gasping)
And I hear my best friend Christy's voice.
You fucking joking me.
(cries out)
(squeals)
Then my boyfriend is like following after her.
Oh, baby!
Fuck, this definitely got the potential
to kick off and cause damage.
That must be like her gay mate that she keeps banging on about,
but, no, it was her boyfriend.
¶
(Holly) You fucking joking me.
Oh, baby!
(Vicky) So Holly's boyfriend and her best friend
come walking through the door.
My jaw practically hits the floor.
He's all right, you know what I mean?
Like no major deformities,
like nothing massively wrong with him
with a naked eye.
Hi, babe, this is Vicky.
Oh, my fucking my God, I never expect that
in a million years, like.
Oh, my God, I'm actually shaking.
This is Dan. Nice to meet you.
And I'm wondering why the fuck are you with her.
Someone gonna get the drinks?
(chattering)
And I didn't what it looked like
because I know what she's been up doing.
Apparently that's the Posh and Becks of Middlesbrough,
fucking hell.
(Vicky) I'll say you've made the effort though.
Like she keeps talking about--
If you ask me, Holly didn't want him to come
because Holly's shit scared of one of us telling him
what she's really getting up to.
Are you missing her?
Yeah. Loads?
Yeah.
(man) How long have you been with her?
A year.
How long? A year.
But it's a year of being with her every single day, so.
Honestly?
That's crazy shit.
Every single day. Wow.
If I was Holly's boyfriend, like, I just...
straight with him, you know what I mean?
Like I don't think he knows like a 100% what she's like.
She's making a fool out of the mate.
Have you been out?
Aye, to fucking midnight last.
I think Holly's taking the piss out of me to be fair.
Pretty much every night she's talking about
getting in to somebody or kissing somebody.
I kissed a random last night by the way.
Yeah, I know, you told m.
No, I didn't. Again last night?
Yeah.
Oh, dear.
This lad ended up kissing me, and I kissed him back.
But I don't even know his name.
I thought I tell you.
I didn't go out with the intention of doing that.
But the opportunity arose, and I just went for it.
Like, I didn't have any feelings for him.
I was just having fun, like.
So which one of them did you kiss.
He's not here.
Is he at work?
Aye.
Fucking hell.
What?
The first night, like, Garry, who's not here,
I kissed him the first night
because we decided to be spooning partners
because I was-- What?!
No, it's not like-- Just listen to me.
So you're the last one in,
and the first thing he said was, "Let's spoon."
I didn't say that. No, him.
Yeah?
I just don't know where-- where she's at
with this relationship.
So basically the line is--
All right, okay, she can't shag anyone,
she can't touch anyone, she can't suck anybody off.
She can look, but she can't touch.
If the whatever, kiss-- Whatever, kiss mean fuck all.
She's with me.
We're all staying out of their way
because we feel absolutely libbity
for what she's doing to him.
I don't quite know how to deal with it right now.
It must been eyeing every single one of yous up.
No, she would've--
She tell him he was called Gary.
So he knows our names.
What the fuck is gonna happen
hen Gary walks through that door?
Is it gonna kick off?
Is he gonna mention anything?
Is he not gonna mention anything?
You guys want to ring Gary and tell Gary to come back in
and say his name's Dave?
If that kid has got the-- got the balls to walk up to Gary
and be like, "Yeah, I heard you touched on me bird.
Who do you think you are?"
Gary will annihilate him.
You dare go off it like she shut you up or so.
Like it was the first night, it was a mistake.
And I'm sorry.
Like, do you know what I mean?
Like, I have to live with these people.
¶
This will just be absolute madness.
What are their reactions gonna be
when Gary walks through that door from work?
I hope he'll just react
the way the other lads and lasses did.
Just be respectful of our relationship.
And let us have a chat, get on with it.
(Gary) We're just chilling.
We came back... We came up...
And we walk into the house, and I see Holly's boyfriend.
Hiya.
I reckon by then that she doesn't got a boyfriend
or she has a fuck up relationship.
Babe, it's my boyfriend and my best friend.
Oh, hi, boyfriend and best friend.
If I had walked in and he said anything,
I would've just knocked him clean out in the Jacuzzi, like.
Gary, faltered for only a second,
before the strut straight over like a peacock.
Gary, man. Good to meet you.
He's got to be thinking,
"I literally had my penis all over your girlfriend
a couple days ago."
(Gary) It was very awkward and a weird situation.
I didn't want to like come in looking guilty.
Say, "Hello, mate," and then like, "Ugh, bye."
But I think she's a bit intimidated.
I think she thinks the whole thing
is gonna come out, and I'll just go "boom"
in her face just like I done the first night.
Would you mind if we and Dan had the guest room tonight?
I have no problem. All right.
All day, we've all been panicked
because for him coming in, for Gary coming home--
You think it's gonna kick off?
We don't know how this situation is gonna pan out.
What we do know is that we got one seriously,
seriously abused boyfriend in the house.
And we have the person who abused him in here as well.
(sighs)
What?
Over.
Get over it, man.
(chuckles)
Sorry.
¶
This morning, woke up and I figure she want
to go for some scran and sort it out,
see where we're gonna go.
You know what I mean, because we've kind of been
going on like this where we're just like coming in every night
arguing about obviously lads, lasses, or whatever.
Sorry I shouted at you last night.
When you said that the other day was just--
I know. I know.
And then last night, I didn't think none of it.
And then you kicked off.
We feel a lot closer than we should feel
for how long we've known each other.
I feel a lot more like attached than I should.
I know that.
It's just fucking with me head, totally like.
I think we've made a massive mistake
being in the same room.
A massive mistake.
We keep seeing like-- Let's just see how it goes.
And let's do this and let's do that.
But then we keep taching on and having a cuddling.
I don't know what to say.
I'd love to be able to just keep it like that
and let him kiss other people
and me kiss other people as well.
But I went boot-clean-off if I saw him kissing someone else.
I don't know, don't you just think like
being so close to each other, like in that room,
there's just-- It's just begs--
It's just begs for like a cuddle.
I'm in total limbo right now.
I've got no idea what's going on.
And every time we try to talk, we just go around in circles.
I do not see a positive solution for this at the moment.
Like I think just for now the best idea
is carry on the way we are.
I'll try and--
I'll try and calm meself down a bit.
You try and be a bit more respectful when you can.
And if that doesn't work,
and we can't deal with that situation,
then we just seriously got to think about moving rooms.
Moving rooms?
You can have Holly.
(laughing)
Are you mad?
To be honest, we're still no further forward
in terms of what we're gonna do.
And it was like I think we're just kind of come up with
a temporary solution.
We're just gonna carry on the way we're going.
But obviously, all of that's gonna lead to is
another argument tonight I would imagine.
¶
We're all really apprehensive right now
about how this night's gonna pan out.
But see, we can't tell Holly
what to do with her friends and her "boyfriend".
I think something's gonna kick off tonight.
Like, she told her boyfriend that day
her and Gary snugged, but it was more than that.
So I think it might slip out tonight.
Who's to say that after he's had a couple drinks,
he's not gonna turn into
some sort of absolute die-hard psychopath.
If it does kick off, you know what I mean,
I'll probably be straight in the middle of it in any ways.
¶
Friday night, our secret Tup Tup,
only place to be in New Castle.
It's absolutely bouncing, absolutely awesome.
I had the time of me life.
Loads of birds kicking about.
¶
Holly and Dan spend the vast majority of the night
motorboating the fuck out of her breasts.
And Dan-- Dan like is constantly
can't let her go for like 30 seconds.
He's constantly touching her.
And they're were like eating each others faces off.
Like...
It was bad.
¶
Holly's boyfriend literally just sat back on a few vodkas,
and he was fine.
To be fair, he was more sound than Holly.
He could've had a few drinks and got a bit hard and had a go.
I didn't want that because he would've just
ended up him getting hurt.
¶
I thought I'd shake his hand, and say,
"Unlucky me, the butch is yours."
¶
Fuck, Jay wanting another fucking conversation
about what's going on.
And me thinking I was telling him
what he wanted to hear.
Yeah?
I won't kiss anyone else tonight, okay?
A the daft (bleep) puts his pedal about.
He's like, "All right, okay, well, I won't.
Like I'm stopping him doing what he wanted.
I was like, "Right, fine, kid. No bother."
Walked straight off, went and got me tach on.
So was Jay, ta-da.
¶
Then we go back to where Jay's standing,
and he doesn't know about what's happening.
I just necked on to somebody else,
and he's all sunshine, smiles, the lot.
"Aw, Vicky, like, come on, like,
I like you, I just want to kiss you."
And blah, blah, blah, and the rest of it.
What a bell and I am.
I clearly think he fancies me.
So now, I actually feel guilty.
I'm so happy because I love Jay and Vicky.
I want them to get married.
(Jay) I can't help like feeling the way you do.
Do you know what I mean?
Especially when you spend so much time with someone.
I do think she feels the same way.
I know for a fact, Jay's dying to bang her.
You wouldn't keep doing this if you didn't want to bang her.
¶
We're all in group and Holly and her boyfriend
just stood out like a sore thumb.
Everyone looked at them thinking what are they doing with us.
All I remember is like one minute being sober
and the next minute I'm fucking malled.
They just were on furniture climbing around
like spider monkeys.
She was a health and safety hazard.
(Sophie) She's so drunk.
She smashing all the bottles on the shelf.
And we're like, "You know, that's a big piss take.
We can't just let her get away from it."
I don't want to upset the girl intentionally,
but she had to be told that you can't behave like that.
This is not Middlesbrough.
This is Tup Tup Palace VIP.
Just behave that way, please.
And from then, I just started getting angry.
Holly just bursts into tears and storms off.
(screaming)
I just want to tell them! Let me go!
I couldn't stop crying.
When I'm in a state like that, there's no stopping me at all.
I go mental.
No, I want to go home!
And I want to go--
And I don't know if she was trying to hit him
or slap him or get him off her or whatever,
but I think it's just a whole--
I think he was trying to stop her from leaving.
But she had in her head that she wanted to leave.
Seriously, I want to go.
I want to leave.
No! I want to leave!
I want to leave.
Nothing is gonna keep me here, yeah?
I don't even want to say bye to anybody.
I'm finished, I just want to go.
Fucking get off me.
Get off me. Get off me.
A girl can not stay in a house for so long
and feel this way every day.
It's torturing her.
Get off me. Get off me!
Who gives a fuck if she goes or stays?
I really don't care anymore.
Get me home!
¶
Drag us into bed and all that.
I think the mission in me house
is, um, pretty much to bang Vicky.
I haven't thought about other lasses,
do you know what I mean?
I think you do.
I think it's best we talk about this tomorrow.
No, because- Why?
Because you're drunk.
I'm not drunk, I'm sober as day.
Vicky says it'll take months before I'm allowed to bang her.
But you know what, I reckon I can do it in weeks.
Jay will have to work hard if he wants--
if he wants to bang.
And I don't know if he's got it in him.
I'll tell you the truth because I know that's what you want.
I do like Gary,
kind of being fancying him.
(Holly) Just feeling pathetic,
I can't trust a single fucking person in this house.
I can't trust anybody, I can't.
I don't fucking want to.
¶
(cheering)
It's all about Jay today, like you know?
The world's revolving around him at this moment and time.
It's your birthday, man.
Will you fuck off?
It's got to be a massive big thing,
like a big national holiday.
Everyone's gonna know about Jason's birthday.
I don't actually know how old Jay is.
I'm getting told 21.
Then I getting told 25.
And then people are laughing, and I'm sure I've heard--
I'm sure 23 has been thrown in there somewhere.
(laughing)
And I was like, "Nice one.
Now, will you fuck off and let us get back to kip."
Happy birthday!
Oh, yeah? You're right.
Here's a card for you.
Open it.
Holly didn't sign the card.
Neither did Vicky actually.
Thanks everyone.
I just tache on with him.
Could you want a better present than that?
¶
I woke up this morning, I still felt a bit like shit.
I felt like I embarrassed myself.
I just wanted to like go home and like be with my boyfriend.
I'm on a proper rollercoaster.
One minute I want to stay, one minute I want to leave.
It's like depending on my emotions,
I don't know what I want.
Get off.
Aren't you cold? No.
If Holly left that night, I wouldn't even know now.
She was in the guest room but none even went up to check
to see if she was there, if she wasn't there.
And that just shows pretty much how much of a bother--
Do you know what I mean?
I really don't care anymore.
One minute she's home sick.
The next minute she's happy.
Haway, man.
Knew that one's fucking bi-polar posh from Kerry Katona.
She's taking the piss.
Like she could be a nice enough girl.
But until I start seeing some real evidence of that,
I'm not gonna bend over backwards for her.
Holly and her boyfriend came down.
I wasn't really up although to be honest.
But that means they are. "I'm going home now."
Nice to meet you, man.
Not too hung to drive home are you?
I haven't got a problem with the kid.
I mean, he's made the effort to come say bye.
Nice job done.
I turn the bubbles off to sort to speak
and say bye.
You going home? Yeah.
So I said bye and they're still standing there.
And I want to turn the bubbles back on
and I'm trying to be polite.
I don't even want to talk to them anymore.
I wanted him to just get out and go.
All right, I'm turning it on again.
Bye. See ya.
Bye. Bye.
Enjoy your day.
I'm getting food.
(chattering)
Oh, gonna miss you.
It didn't upset me saying bye neither.
Like, I felt honestly content that he knew I was okay.
And it was really nice.
So I'm glad he came in the end.
Love ya.
¶
Go, go, go.
For Jay's birthday we want to do something different.
Like, so we all ended up going go-carting.
And I was the best.
Birthday boy was loving it, birthday boy wouldn't get off.
¶
(cheering)
Charlotte's whizzing about, she's doing well.
I says, "Oh, Gaz--"
Your girlfriend's beating Greg.
I suppose will.
And he didn't even deny it.
Say she wasn't your girlfriend, eh?
Still remains, isn't it.
Oh, there's definitely something going on there, like.
The word "girlfriend" and I didn't even tweak
or deny it or say nothing.
I just barred things sure.
I was gutted after.
I was like, "What am I doing?"
She's definitely not me girlfriend though.
(tires screech)
Go on, Vicky, lass!
The lads are loving it,
Sophie and Char are happy,
and then there's just one misery in the corner.
Everyone else seem to be like loving it
and I wasn't.
Like I was watching this go-kart go around and around.
It was boring as fuck for me.
Like I probably didn't enjoy it.
I seem to not really ever have anything in common with anyone.
¶
(doorbell chimes)
Ding-dong! Ding-dong!
Who's this?
(Jay) Got me mum, me nanny, me brother, me brother's lass
and there two roommates there.
Nice surprise for Jay. It's nice for his birthday,
them all coming.
(chattering)
Well, the family came,
and everyone came down to see them.
There's no sign of Vicky.
To be honest with you,
I thought Vicky would be the first one down, like,
meet the parents and all that.
I think it's because we're way in the...
Oh, he has the mother-in-law, go and meet the family.
I ran away and hid, not sorry ever.
No one's gonna make me be sorry about that.
This is my room, so.
Messiest.
And then what ensued was a small cat and mouse game
where the family moved higher up the house,
and I moved higher up the house.
'Till eventually when there was nowhere else to go
and they were encroaching on me
and they found me.
And this is the lasses' room.
Meeting the parents after I've known him for like five days.
I was so scared.
(Jay) I think Vicky, at first, just probably a bit nervous.
Eventually Vicky comes to meet me mother and--
But do you know what, to be honest,
I can't really remember much of that
because I was absolutely wrecked by that stage.
Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.
It was awful.
I did not know how to deal with the situation.
I was completely intimidated, and I hate it.
¶
We all go to Marco Polo's for-- Have a meal.
Two of me mates as well which was really nice.
I can kind of maintained a semblance of harmony
throughout the night.
I felt like I got a girlfriend role.
And it was quite nice.
Jay's actually really falling for Vicky.
Like I heard him last night telling his friends.
He was like, "She's the one and I really, really like her."
Things like that.
Oh, my God.
Vicky and Jay would probably change their status on Facebook
to in a relationship, that's how serious it is.
If it was me and Gaz it would it's complicated.
Gaz is like goes on as if he's got a heart of stone
and that he doesn't care about no birds and that.
But I think Charlotte might be chipping away at it, like.
I know for a fact that I'll end up hurting her.
And I'm just gonna have to pull her aside
and just nip it in the bud.
Even though she's a bunker,
but it's one of them girls that if you keep on going with,
you will get feelings for it.
And it will just end up like--
She'll end up hurt, she'll end up--
It'll be drama every time we go out.
I had a chat with Charlotte.
And I says, "You know, Char, you've got to stop this.
You're gonna get your heart broken, girl."
I am not under any circumstances whatsoever
falling in love with Gaz, not at all.
So people need to stop thinking that way
or else I will end up smashing someone's face in
and it maybe Gaz's.
(cheering)
¶
You know, in Powerhouse, we're in the VIP.
We were treated like absolute princesses and kings.
We had the time of our life.
Jay's birthday could not have gone better.
It was a great night.
Powerhouse was amazing.
We were all just sitting, having a drink.
And there was a blonde girl hover around VIP all night.
And we were like, "Who is this girl?"
And we see Jay and her going to the toilet.
What the fuck did she do to me?
It didn't look right, didn't look right.
And Vicky seen this, so Vicky was like, "Pow."
Straight up.
¶
There, there, there.
The blonde girl was in the toilet
with one of the bouncers of the club,
so we couldn't do fuck all.
They literally just walked up to the toilet.
Who?
Jay came down with her, nothing happened at all.
Are the girls--
I'm just gonna walk up.
An absolute mortal melee.
She looks like Kermit the Frog.
I don't care what she looks like.
All that must've happened, they just consistently
walked to the toilet.
So it made Vicky look a little bit stupid.
She obviously thinking I was being sly
about the whole situation.
Which made me kick off as well.
Then I heard, "Bang."
I see Jay kicking the fucking table.
I was like, "What the fuck's he doing here, like?"
It's like he's starting the march.
Item number one.
Don't want any of that in here.
We just here to shag and fun.
How can you take someone seriously
when they're shouting at you
with their top off and their eyebrows waxed?
I think she loves the fact that I'm all man.
I can't remember a thing.
And I know we tached on afterwards
so it probably meant nowt.
¶
Me and Jay are obsessed in the bedroom.
And it's the first chance
we've had to probably be alone and speak.
We still haven't come to any terms
of what's actually happening.
What can we do? What we can't do?
It's all what we're saying is,
is that it's basically if we carry on
the way we're going,
it's just constantly gonna be arguing every night we go out.
We don't want that. The house doesn't want that.
Yeah, I don't like the thought of Jay kissing anyone else.
So I'm happy with that part of the decision.
Um, I, of course, am a bit good at that.
I'm not gonna be able to be like go
and creeping and taching on.
Vicky is a bit of flirt, do you know what I mean?
She's like a cuddly person and cuddly on beer
and shit like that.
But I know that's her personality.
She knows that I don't like it.
Um, but the more feelings that I have for her,
the more she's gonna have to cut it out.
Right now, I've got my lips on lockdown.
I am throwing away the key.
No more taching on.
I can't upset Jay.
Like, I cannot hurt this boy's feelings.
¶
(whispering)
It's like sex in the air.
It's not sanitary, like is it?
It's not.
I love cooking, I love being the mother,
and I love being the mother hen.
And these are me boys, these are me girls.
So I thought I cook a proper full on course.
You know, make them feel home from home.
So it's the bees knees sitting there dolled
because of Gary?
We're sitting in the guest room peeling potatoes
with us two tramps,
and you got you false eyelashes on.
I don't know.
I just want to look stunning all the time.
You just want to look nice for Gary.
No I don't! I don't!
I'm so angry about this whole Gary situation.
I don't even like him that much.
And everyone's made it out as if I'm in love with him.
How can I be done with this?
Well, you need to get rid of that label.
Because right now you're getting painted as like--
A stalker.
Gary's little bitch. Shit.
He actually thinks that he's really good looking as well.
He actually thinks that he's absolutely stunning.
And fair enough, he's got a six pack,
but anyone can have a six pack
if you are the size of an actually stick.
All the girls are saying,
"Oh, Charlotte, you're gonna get hurt."
No, I'm not gonna get hurt.
Wait until another boy comes back here,
and I will be in that guest room.
And I don't think anyone will be getting hurt at all.
Maybe that boy.
We'll be bouncing so hard that he might be getting hurt.
But I will be not under no circumstances be getting hurt
by anyone.
Here's what we do,
I'm gonna just bring someone back.
I'm just gonna bring someone back,
and then "whoosh", it's over.
¶
I woke up this morning, and I just feel like
a little bit of shit.
I just feel completely isolated, like.
I mean, I couldn't give a shit.
Well, we see what you got, Holly.
No bothers me.
Never tidy up after yourself, like.
I mean, nobody's being intentionally like nasty
or anything.
No one's actually like saying anything bad about me.
It's just like little things.
I do try, I cleaned up today.
You left some cheese, a full block of cheese,
on there for literally about two days.
After I used the block of cheese?
You did, mate.
Because you were grating in your bowl of cheese.
Oh, yeah, that might've been mine.
You left it on there.
I do apologize, I am trying.
I think she thinks that she's just a bit left out.
But I don't think she thinks
that's because everyone hates her
which is the real reason why she's left out.
I think it's just dried and congealed.
I'll give it like tonight.
I'll see what happens tonight.
And if I do still feel left out,
then there's nothing much else I can do.
¶
I look so pretty.
Do you? No.
¶
So we're in Bijoux, and I'm looking around
and there's not many nice lads there.
And I'm thinking, "Shit, I need to do this.
I need to do this tonight."
I'm going to prove that I am better than Gary
at being a player.
I need to find someone so everyone knows
I'm not in love with Gary.
¶
Gary's got a little bit of an obsession
with a barmaid at Bijoux.
I see her all the time.
She's always got a boyfriend, I never got her number.
"Still with your boyfriend?"
No, she's single.
I was like-- My face literally lit up.
She's ordinary of sort.
But once I'm actually so excited to go on a date Greg style.
¶
Do you know what, I'm a barmaid too, you know?
Bet I'm a better barmaid than her.
Obviously I'm been putting on a brood face on
for like the past couple of days now.
I mean, I'm still going out, I'm having fun.
But I don't feel like I'm having as much fun as everyone else.
¶
And it's just wearing me down trying to act like I'm happy
when I'm not.
¶
James, stop falling in love.
I tried to give it this one last night
to actually for everyone to like prove that
they weren't leaving me out.
But it's blatantly obvious that they are.
It's like I'm just following people around.
¶
It's not nice.
Like I'm trying to dance with people
and they're just literally cutting in front of me
to dance with another person like in our same group.
It's like why don't you want me there?
¶
So I'm dancing with Holly, having a good time.
And then she just says, "Look, Charlotte,
I'm gonna go."
And then she gives a big hug and kiss and that.
I was like, "Do you want us to come with you?"
She was like, "No, no, no, no.
¶
We're all out parting, having the best time over.
Girls, they were having a mint time.
I didn't even know that Holly was missing.
I didn't notice that Holly was missing.
Really didn't even realize.
¶
I'm leaving.
(sniffles)
I can't-- I'm trying to be strong.
And I can't do anymore, like.
¶
I just want to see my boyfriend.
And just fucking be in a normal place
with normal people
and not fucking lads who get their eyebrows waxed.
I cannot handle it, like.
It's fucking weird.
I've never been around people like this.
I'm probably gonna miss Charlotte the most
because she's been the one who's been there for me.
I've left her not on her bed just to say like,
"I love you."
And obviously she's been there for me.
Is probably the only person who has been here.
¶
The way things are,
I can't ever see myself coming back.
¶